Hi, I am Charles from Hwa Chong Institution who created this blog. Maybe you're wondering why I give my blog such a name. Well, I will explain.
From my opinion, LOL(laugh out loud)is actually an expression of happiness, or in a more advanced definition, an antidote to all kinds of stress. LOL is a better choice of relieving stress rather than smoking, drinking wine, or even addicting drugs(STRICTLY ILLEGAL!!!!!).
Many scientists concluded that laughing is healthy for every person. I've always regard it as a very correct conclusion. Although in an indirect method, laughing is TRULY good for health.
1)Sad or angry feelings brought substances which are harmful into our body.
2)By laughing, the amount of such substances into our body are lessen. This is why I say laughing is indirectly good to health.
Below are some comics, jokes and comedies I published for people of all kinds. LOL and relieve all your stress!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Monday, January 18, 2010
Sign Jokes
>Teacher: Ok, tell me why you are late today.
Student: I woke up at 6am, and got to school at 7am.
Teacher: But it is 8 o'clock now? How come?
Student: I saw a sign at the school gate. It said :SCHOOL Reduce speed. Therefore,I had to slow down. That's why I'm late today.
Teacher: .................
>One day, a hunter went into the woods. There's a tree with a sign saying: RABBIT SEASON OPEN. It was posted by THE duck who hates his rival enemy, THE rabbit.
Soon, the hunter saw THE rabbit, pointed his rifle at him, and said:"Say your prayers, rabbit!" THE rabbit tied his tip-of-gun and said:"I think you got it all wrong, rabbit season's already closed.Look!"The hunter turned to see the sign, which said:RABBIT SEASON CLOSED.He said:"I'm sorry.I guess I'll just leave here.
THE duck, who is hidden behind a tree, was shocked. Still hidden, he looked at the sign. There's the real sign behind it. He called the hunter:"Hey,pinhead,this's just a fake one.The real one's under it."He then ripped the fake sign off.BLAM BLAM BLAM!!!!!!!!THE duck was being shot.Why? The sign said:DUCK SEASON OPEN.
>A farmer was harvesting his vegetables when a flying saucer landed near his farm. An alien walked out of it, and they use sign language to communicate.
The alien pointed up, then the farmer pointed down.
The alien stretch out its palm, and the farmer pointed a seven-like sign.
The alien pointed something like a gun, then the farmer pointed a squeezing-like sign. Then the alien suddenly hurriedly went into the flying saucer and flew away.
Back home, the farmer said to his wife:
"I met a strange person. He said that vegetables drop from the sky. I corrected as vegetables grow from the ground. He asked how much is 5 kg of vegetables, and I said 7 dollars. He asked how much is 7 kg? I said pay more money. Then he suddenly just went away."
Back to its planet, the alien said to its friend:
"I met a strange but scary person on Earth. I said I come from the sky. And he said he come from under the ground. I said I've killed 5 person, he said he killed 7. I said I killed them with my disentigrater gun, he said he killed them by squeezing them till death. I was afraid that I might become the 8th victim, so I ran away."
Student: I woke up at 6am, and got to school at 7am.
Teacher: But it is 8 o'clock now? How come?
Student: I saw a sign at the school gate. It said :SCHOOL Reduce speed. Therefore,I had to slow down. That's why I'm late today.
Teacher: .................
>One day, a hunter went into the woods. There's a tree with a sign saying: RABBIT SEASON OPEN. It was posted by THE duck who hates his rival enemy, THE rabbit.
Soon, the hunter saw THE rabbit, pointed his rifle at him, and said:"Say your prayers, rabbit!" THE rabbit tied his tip-of-gun and said:"I think you got it all wrong, rabbit season's already closed.Look!"The hunter turned to see the sign, which said:RABBIT SEASON CLOSED.He said:"I'm sorry.I guess I'll just leave here.
THE duck, who is hidden behind a tree, was shocked. Still hidden, he looked at the sign. There's the real sign behind it. He called the hunter:"Hey,pinhead,this's just a fake one.The real one's under it."He then ripped the fake sign off.BLAM BLAM BLAM!!!!!!!!THE duck was being shot.Why? The sign said:DUCK SEASON OPEN.
>A farmer was harvesting his vegetables when a flying saucer landed near his farm. An alien walked out of it, and they use sign language to communicate.
The alien pointed up, then the farmer pointed down.
The alien stretch out its palm, and the farmer pointed a seven-like sign.
The alien pointed something like a gun, then the farmer pointed a squeezing-like sign. Then the alien suddenly hurriedly went into the flying saucer and flew away.
Back home, the farmer said to his wife:
"I met a strange person. He said that vegetables drop from the sky. I corrected as vegetables grow from the ground. He asked how much is 5 kg of vegetables, and I said 7 dollars. He asked how much is 7 kg? I said pay more money. Then he suddenly just went away."
Back to its planet, the alien said to its friend:
"I met a strange but scary person on Earth. I said I come from the sky. And he said he come from under the ground. I said I've killed 5 person, he said he killed 7. I said I killed them with my disentigrater gun, he said he killed them by squeezing them till death. I was afraid that I might become the 8th victim, so I ran away."
Friday, January 15, 2010
It's all the same
One day, Mr. Green wanted to go to the town to buy some things.
But a heavy rain had just ended and there's lots of puddles in front of his house,and he did not want his feet to be wet. He called to his wife.
Mr. Green: My dear, could you go to the next door and ask Mr Adrian to lend me his boots?
(And so...)
Mrs. Green: Mr. Adrian, my husband would want to borrow your boots.
Mr. Adrian: But that boot, it's....it's.....new....But wait, I've got a better idea, how about he let me carry him?
(Mrs. Green returned home. Back at home.......)
Mr. Green: Damn, I've never seen or heard of such a stingy man before!!(cleared his throat)Honey, I have no idea. Could you bring to me the new boots that I bought this morning?
But a heavy rain had just ended and there's lots of puddles in front of his house,and he did not want his feet to be wet. He called to his wife.
Mr. Green: My dear, could you go to the next door and ask Mr Adrian to lend me his boots?
(And so...)
Mrs. Green: Mr. Adrian, my husband would want to borrow your boots.
Mr. Adrian: But that boot, it's....it's.....new....But wait, I've got a better idea, how about he let me carry him?
(Mrs. Green returned home. Back at home.......)
Mr. Green: Damn, I've never seen or heard of such a stingy man before!!(cleared his throat)Honey, I have no idea. Could you bring to me the new boots that I bought this morning?
LOL Jokes
>A: Excuse me, how do I get to the nearest hospital?
B: Just close your eyes and walk across the street, I bet you could get there very soon!
>Teacher: You have been very bad since the past few months. I hope you can turn over a new leaf.
Student: Ok, I will try.
(However, for the next few months, his bad behaviour seemed to increase instead of decrease)
Teacher: I thought I told you to turn over a new leaf!
Student: But I did.
Teacher: Are you sure?
Student: Of course! I pluck the latest leaf grown from a seed and turned it over!
Teacher: ..............................
>One day, a rabbit hopped into a Chinese herb shop.
Rabbit: Do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper: No.
(The rabbit left. But the next day, it hopped into the shop again)
Rabbit: Do you have carrots
Shopkeeper: But I thought I said no yesterday.
(It left. The next day...)
Rabbit: Do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper: No! No!! NO!!!
(The next day...)
Rabbit: Do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper: How many times do I have to tell you that there's no carrot here??????!!!!!!!!
(This continued for a few days, and each day the shopkeeper got more angry. One day...)
Shopkeeper: Are you gonna ask me whether I have carrots again?
Rabbit: No, but do you have milk?
Shopkeeper: No.
Rabbit : Then do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper:!@#$%^&?><^&%$#$@!
>A patient hadn't been sleeping well recently and so he seek the doctor for help.
"No worries,"said the doctor"if you couldn't sleep well just try and count to 50000."
And so the next day, the patient went to the doctor again.
"I use your method to help me to sleep.""It worked?""It's already sunrise when I finished."
>One day, a professor is doing a research on his project. His wife came in and served him a cup of water.
Professor: Darling, have you seen my pen?
His wife: Isn't it at your ear?
Professor(angrily): Can't you see that I'm busy? Tell me precisely, which ear is it at?
His wife: .........................
>A tourist visited a foreign country. During his visit, he got ill, but he didn't know which clinic can cure him. He asked a person of the country. He said: 'No worries, there's a law in our country. Whenever the doctor of any clinic has failed to cure a patient, which mostly leads to death, he has to hang a balloon.'
The tourist searched for a suitable clinic. He saw one with 25 balloons, and one with 30 balloons. At last, he saw a clinic with only 5 balloons. He walked into it.
The nurse said:'You must wait. This clinic started its business this morning and now the doctor is really busy.'
>Sam was sticking a stamp on his letter, waiting to be put into the mailbox. An old man came to him and said:"Can you please write a letter for me, young man? I'm too old to write.""Okay,"said Sam. "Help me write'To my dearest old friend Hubert:'" "Okay,"said Sam. "And then write'How are you? I've never sent a letter to you since two months ago because of the holidays. Sorry to keep you waiting.'" "Okay, sure.""Write 'I would like to tell you about my life during the
holidays.'""Okay, okay..."said Sam with a little frustrated.
The old man asked Sam to write more words on his letter, and each time Sam became more and more frustrated.
"Okay, just write'Sincerely, Cody' will do.""Is that all?"Sam said with a frustrated tone and handed Cody the letter. The old man looked at the letter, hesitated for a while, then said"I'm sorry, could you write'PS: Sorry for the untidiness of the words I wrote.'?"
B: Just close your eyes and walk across the street, I bet you could get there very soon!
>Teacher: You have been very bad since the past few months. I hope you can turn over a new leaf.
Student: Ok, I will try.
(However, for the next few months, his bad behaviour seemed to increase instead of decrease)
Teacher: I thought I told you to turn over a new leaf!
Student: But I did.
Teacher: Are you sure?
Student: Of course! I pluck the latest leaf grown from a seed and turned it over!
Teacher: ..............................
>One day, a rabbit hopped into a Chinese herb shop.
Rabbit: Do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper: No.
(The rabbit left. But the next day, it hopped into the shop again)
Rabbit: Do you have carrots
Shopkeeper: But I thought I said no yesterday.
(It left. The next day...)
Rabbit: Do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper: No! No!! NO!!!
(The next day...)
Rabbit: Do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper: How many times do I have to tell you that there's no carrot here??????!!!!!!!!
(This continued for a few days, and each day the shopkeeper got more angry. One day...)
Shopkeeper: Are you gonna ask me whether I have carrots again?
Rabbit: No, but do you have milk?
Shopkeeper: No.
Rabbit : Then do you have carrots?
Shopkeeper:!@#$%^&?><^&%$#$@!
>A patient hadn't been sleeping well recently and so he seek the doctor for help.
"No worries,"said the doctor"if you couldn't sleep well just try and count to 50000."
And so the next day, the patient went to the doctor again.
"I use your method to help me to sleep.""It worked?""It's already sunrise when I finished."
>One day, a professor is doing a research on his project. His wife came in and served him a cup of water.
Professor: Darling, have you seen my pen?
His wife: Isn't it at your ear?
Professor(angrily): Can't you see that I'm busy? Tell me precisely, which ear is it at?
His wife: .........................
>A tourist visited a foreign country. During his visit, he got ill, but he didn't know which clinic can cure him. He asked a person of the country. He said: 'No worries, there's a law in our country. Whenever the doctor of any clinic has failed to cure a patient, which mostly leads to death, he has to hang a balloon.'
The tourist searched for a suitable clinic. He saw one with 25 balloons, and one with 30 balloons. At last, he saw a clinic with only 5 balloons. He walked into it.
The nurse said:'You must wait. This clinic started its business this morning and now the doctor is really busy.'
>Sam was sticking a stamp on his letter, waiting to be put into the mailbox. An old man came to him and said:"Can you please write a letter for me, young man? I'm too old to write.""Okay,"said Sam. "Help me write'To my dearest old friend Hubert:'" "Okay,"said Sam. "And then write'How are you? I've never sent a letter to you since two months ago because of the holidays. Sorry to keep you waiting.'" "Okay, sure.""Write 'I would like to tell you about my life during the
holidays.'""Okay, okay..."said Sam with a little frustrated.
The old man asked Sam to write more words on his letter, and each time Sam became more and more frustrated.
"Okay, just write'Sincerely, Cody' will do.""Is that all?"Sam said with a frustrated tone and handed Cody the letter. The old man looked at the letter, hesitated for a while, then said"I'm sorry, could you write'PS: Sorry for the untidiness of the words I wrote.'?"
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Here's the question:
There was a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals,
A Lion, a Chimpanzee, a Giraffe, and a Squirrel, who pass by.
They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree.
Who do you guess will win?
Your answer will reflect your personality.
So think carefully . .. .. Try and answer within 30 seconds
Got your answer? Now scroll down to see the analysis.
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If your answer is:
Lion = you're dull.
Chimpanzee = you're a moron.
Giraffe = you're a complete idiot.
Squirrel = you're just hopelessly stupid.
A COCONUT TREE DOESN'T HAVE BANANAS.
(scroll up for the question to check)
Obviously you're stressed and overworked. You should take some time off and relax! Try again next year. Laughs more and pass on laughter to others… it gets us through our days !
There was a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals,
A Lion, a Chimpanzee, a Giraffe, and a Squirrel, who pass by.
They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree.
Who do you guess will win?
Your answer will reflect your personality.
So think carefully . .. .. Try and answer within 30 seconds
Got your answer? Now scroll down to see the analysis.
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If your answer is:
Lion = you're dull.
Chimpanzee = you're a moron.
Giraffe = you're a complete idiot.
Squirrel = you're just hopelessly stupid.
A COCONUT TREE DOESN'T HAVE BANANAS.
(scroll up for the question to check)
Obviously you're stressed and overworked. You should take some time off and relax! Try again next year. Laughs more and pass on laughter to others… it gets us through our days !
The dictionary of humour
Window: An entrance made for thieves.
Standing on your head: One way to raise the earth up.
Giraffe: During the examination of animals, the probability of him peeking other's answer is the largest.
Car: Made by terrorists to kill people.
Unicorn: An extremely stupid horse disguised as a goat.
ASAP: As swift as a pig.
(all the definitions provided are just for gags)
Standing on your head: One way to raise the earth up.
Giraffe: During the examination of animals, the probability of him peeking other's answer is the largest.
Car: Made by terrorists to kill people.
Unicorn: An extremely stupid horse disguised as a goat.
ASAP: As swift as a pig.
(all the definitions provided are just for gags)
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